11 Workplace Microaggressions Examples: Expert Tested
Introduction
Hey there! I’m thrilled you’re here to tackle this super important topic! As a Fortune 500 recruiter and career coach with a Master’s in Human Resources from Texas A&M (whoop!), I’ve seen my fair share of workplace drama. But let me tell you – nothing gets under my skin quite like microaggressions. I am here to share 11 workplace microaggressions examples!
When I won the SHRM Foundation’s Diversity and Inclusion award, I promised myself I’d help others recognize and stop these subtle but harmful behaviors. I even wrote an article on how to create an inclusive workplace culture here. Let’s dive into some real examples I’ve encountered throughout my career!
Example 1: The “Where Are You Really From?” Question
Why This Question is More Than Just Small Talk
Okay girlfriends, let’s get real for a hot minute! As someone who’s spent years in Fortune 500 recruiting, I cannot tell you how many times I’ve witnessed this scenario play out.
Picture this: A new team member joins the company, and within the first five minutes of small talk, someone drops the “But where are you really from?” bomb. Y’all, this is NOT okay! This can negatively impact a candidate’s mental health, and make them feel like a marginalized group that is just a joke to a new team.
Here’s the truth bomb you need to hear: When you ask someone where they’re “really” from, you’re basically telling them they don’t belong here. It’s like saying, “Hey, you look different, so you must be from somewhere else!” I’ve seen the way professionals of Asian, Latino, black people, and other diverse backgrounds have to deal with this question on repeat, and let me tell you – it’s exhausting!
Example 2: Mispronouncing Names Repeatedly
The Name Game Nobody Wants to Play
Let’s have a come-to-Jesus moment about names, shall we? Y’all, if you can learn to pronounce Tchaikovsky and Schwarzenegger, you can learn to pronounce your colleague’s name correctly!
I saw this constantly during my recruiting days, and it still makes me want to flip a table! You want to avoid unconscious bias and a toxic work culture by learning colleague’s names and making him/her feel part of the team.
Here’s the deal: When you consistently mispronounce someone’s name (especially after they’ve corrected you), you’re sending a clear message that you don’t value them enough to make the effort. They have tried to address minor racial microaggressions, and you are not taking notice.
Fun fact from my HR Master’s research at Texas A&M: People whose names are consistently mispronounced often experience higher levels of workplace stress and lower levels of belonging. Help be part of the solution for marginalized communities and learn a person’s name.
Example 3: Gender-Based Task Assignment
The “Office Housework” Hustle
Girl, we need to talk about something that’s driving me CRAZY in offices everywhere! You know what I’m talking about – it’s that “subtle” expectation that women will naturally take notes in meetings, plan office parties, or remember everyone’s birthdays.
As if we don’t have actual jobs to do! Job satisfaction is proven to plummet when women experience microaggressions in the workplace.
During my Fortune 500 days, I saw this pattern everywhere – accomplished women with MBA degrees being asked to order lunch while their male colleagues at the same level were asked to lead strategy discussions. And don’t even get me started on the “You’re so good at organizing things!” comments.
Example 4: “You’re So Articulate!”
The Backhanded Compliment Nobody Asked For
Alright, sister, buckle up because we need to have a serious chat about this so-called “compliment” that’s actually doing more harm than good.
When someone tells a professional of color they’re “so articulate,” what they’re really saying is, “Wow, you’ve defied my low expectations!” This can negatively impact self-esteem and can be considered everyday slights that drive down productivity in the workforce.
I remember sitting in a leadership meeting where a brilliant Black person executive had just finished presenting a market analysis, and someone hit her with the “You’re so articulate!” line. The room got quiet, and you could feel the air being sucked out.
Y’all, this woman had two master’s degrees and was a recognized industry expert – being articulate was literally the bare minimum expectation for her role!
Help identify stereotypes and end racial microaggressions in the workplace and racial epithets among your co-workers. You can address microaggressions in a few ways that will make a male manager sit up and understand overt discrimination in a new light.
Example 5: Age-Related Comments
The Generation Game Nobody Wins
Listen up, because this tea is hot! Age-related microaggressions are running wild in our workplaces, and I am NOT here for it! Whether it’s calling someone “sweetie” because they’re young or making jokes about someone not understanding technology because they’re older, it’s all garbage and needs to stop!
In my career coaching practice, I’ve heard it all – “You’re too young to be in charge,” “OK Boomer,” “Must be nice to be so young and energetic,” or my personal favorite, “At your age, you probably don’t remember when…” STOP IT RIGHT NOW! Age discrimination goes both ways, and it’s not just rude – it’s literally illegal under the Age Discrimination in Employment Act!
Here’s your reality check: Age has nothing to do with capability. I’ve seen 25-year-olds revolutionize company processes and 60-year-olds master new technologies faster than anyone else. Success isn’t about your birth year – it’s about your mindset, skills, and willingness to learn.
These backhand comments, especially for female direct reports, can lead to decreased self-esteem. Be the example younger people need to see in the workplace.
Example 6: Disability-Related Assumptions
The Ability Conversation We Need to Have
Y’all, let me tell you something that happened during my recruiting days that still makes my blood boil! I watched a hiring manager assume a candidate with a visible disability wouldn’t be able to handle “fast-paced work” – without even asking about their capabilities!
Listen up, because this is important: Having a disability doesn’t mean someone needs you to make decisions for them. I’ve seen professionals with disabilities absolutely crush their goals while dealing with colleagues who constantly ask “Do you need help with that?” for basic tasks they’ve been doing for years. The assumption that disability equals inability is not just wrong – it’s undermining talented professionals! Regardless if you are a black woman or a white male, you are capable with or without a disability.
Example 7: Religious Accommodation Dismissal
Faith in the Workplace: Let’s Get Real
Okay friends, grab your coffee because we need to have a serious chat about religious respect in the workplace! During my time as a Fortune 500 recruiter, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard “It’s just a quick team lunch during Ramadan” or “Everyone has to work on Saturdays, even if it’s your Sabbath!”
Here’s the deal: Religious accommodation isn’t optional, and it’s not something to roll your eyes at! When your Muslim colleague needs a prayer break, or your Jewish team member can’t make it to Friday happy hour, that’s not them being difficult – that’s them practicing their constitutional rights!
And let me spill some professional tea here: Companies that respect religious diversity often see higher employee engagement and retention. I’ve seen it firsthand! So next time you’re planning that “mandatory” team event, maybe check the religious calendar first? And for the love of all things in this world PLEASE make sure you have a strict policy against displaying white supremacist symbols in the office.
Example 8: LGBTQ+ Exclusionary Language
The Pronouns and Respect Conversation
Let’s get real for a hot minute about LGBTQ+ sexual orientation inclusion in the workplace! Y’all, it’s 2024, and I’m still hearing people say things like “That’s not your real name” to transgender colleagues or “Which one’s the husband?” to LGBTQ+ employees. As someone who’s worked in HR for years, I can tell you this isn’t just rude – it’s creating a hostile work environment!
The truth is, using someone’s correct pronouns and chosen name isn’t “political correctness” – it’s basic human respect! I’ve watched incredible professionals struggle to bring their whole selves to work because of these subtle digs and exclusions. And don’t even get me started on the “traditional family” comments in benefits discussions!
Remember this: Your LGBTQ+ colleagues aren’t asking for special treatment – they’re asking for the same respect you automatically give to straight and cisgender colleagues. Period!
Example 9: Parental Status Assumptions
The Mommy (and Daddy) Track Myth
Girl, we need to talk about something that’s making me crazy in corporate America! The assumption that parents (especially moms) are somehow less committed to their careers is about as outdated as shoulder pads and fax machines!
I’ve seen it all – passing over new moms for promotions, assuming dad won’t want to travel, or my personal favorite: “Oh, you must be so torn between work and family!” Excuse me? Can we not with this nonsense? In my career coaching practice, I’ve worked with countless parents who are absolutely crushing it at both work and home!
Here’s your wake-up call: Parental status has zero correlation with professional commitment. Some of the most efficient and organized professionals I’ve worked with are parents who’ve mastered the art of time management. So let’s drop these 1950s assumptions, shall we?
Example 10: Cultural Style Policing
The “Professional Look” Conversation
Alright friends, let’s talk about something that makes me want to flip tables – the policing of cultural hairstyles, dress, and expression in the workplace! During my time in HR, I’ve seen everything from comments about natural hair being “unprofessional” to subtle digs about cultural dress during heritage months.
Let me be crystal clear: Your bias about what looks “professional” is probably rooted in some seriously outdated and culturally narrow thinking! I’ve seen the CROWN Act change lives, but we still have work to do. Your colleague’s box braids, hijab, or traditional jewelry aren’t unprofessional – your comments about them are!
And honey, if you think this isn’t a big deal, let me tell you about the countless professionals I’ve coached who felt pressured to change their appearance to “fit in.” That stops now!
Example 11: The “Just Kidding!” Defense
When “Jokes” Aren’t Funny
Oh my goodness, we need to talk about the most annoying excuse in workplace history – the “Just kidding!” defense. You know what I’m talking about – those “jokes” about someone’s accent, those “funny” comments about women being emotional, all followed by “Can’t you take a joke?”
Listen up, because this is important: If you have to defend your joke by saying “I’m just kidding,” it probably wasn’t appropriate for the workplace in the first place! During my years in HR, I’ve seen how these “jokes” create a toxic work environment and erode team trust faster than my morning coffee disappears!
Remember this: Professional humor doesn’t punch down, and it doesn’t need a disclaimer. If you’re not sure if your joke is appropriate, it probably isn’t!
Conclusion
Your Call to Action for a Better Workplace
Y’all, we’ve covered a lot of ground here, but here’s the bottom line: Creating an inclusive workplace isn’t just about avoiding lawsuits (though trust your HR girl, that’s important too!). It’s about building a space where everyone can show up as their authentic selves and do their best work!
As someone who’s been in the trenches of HR and D&I work, I can tell you that change starts with awareness. These micro-aggressions might seem small, but they add up to create major barriers for talented professionals. The good news? We can all be part of the solution!
Remember: You don’t have to be perfect, but you do have to be willing to learn, grow, and do better. Start today by checking your own behaviors and being an ally to others. Together, we can create workplaces where everyone thrives!
Frequently Asked Questions
Q1: “How do I respond when I witness a microaggression?”
Girl, I’m so glad you asked! First, assess the situation – is this something you can address at the moment, or does it need to be escalated to HR? If you’re addressing it directly, use “I” statements like “I noticed that comment made people uncomfortable” or “I don’t think that was the intent, but that could be interpreted as discriminatory.” Remember, the goal is to educate, not humiliate!
Q2: “What if I accidentally commit a microaggression?”
Listen, we all mess up sometimes! The key is how you handle it. First, genuinely apologize – none of that “I’m sorry if you were offended” nonsense! Take responsibility, learn from it, and do better next time. As someone who’s worked in HR for years, I can tell you that people respect accountability way more than perfection!
Q3: “How can I report microaggressions without being seen as ‘too sensitive’?”
Oh friend, I hear this one all the time in my coaching practice! Document everything – dates, times, what was said, who was present. Use your company’s reporting channels (usually HR or your supervisor) and focus on the impact these behaviors have on work performance and team dynamics. Remember, you’re not being too sensitive – you’re being professional by addressing workplace behavior that affects productivity and morale!
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